ryc:  I appreciate you taking time to share your very personal comments.  Abuse of a child is so at the core of one’s being.  Restoration can mean different things to different people, of course.  Scripture conveys that He will restore what the locust has taken.  My expereinces were with CSA too.  I believe that even if innocence was taken/grasped away…. in God’s own unique way, it can be restored too.  But it is a process, not the wave of God’s magical wand.  I have found, and keep finding, that trust in God can be restored.  Others, that is more complicated.  Trust is built after another has been forgiven.  It is like respect, it has to be earned.  Yes, forgiveness is the big, foundational issue.  His promise to me has been with the unfolding rose…. “He makes all things beautiful in its time.”  He promised to me that I would blossom as the young woman He had designed, whole, as if the innocence had not been taken.  A new virginity.  But I also appreciate finding out what beautiful means. … ‘appropriate’.  (Not perfect like I might imagine beautiful to mean.) One may still have some memories, but they are not in technicolor falling off the shelf.  They are black & white.  That happened, that is very sad that another would do that to a child.  Impact of sin in the world as a result of God giving choice to man.  By God’s grace I am able to forgive, and keep forgiving.  There may be lingering sadness, but like you said, it is not impacting your every day life.   Blessings as you continue in your day by day, moment by moment, journey with Him.   We are truly, completely whole when we are Home with Him.